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Mr. Carey stood up slowly and shook hands with the little boy. Then on second thoughts he bent down and kissed his forehead. He was a man of somewhat less than average height, inclined to corpulence, with his hair, worn long, arranged over the scalp so as to conceal his baldness. He was clean shaven. His features were regular, and it was possible to imagine that in his youth he had been good looking. On his watch chain he wore a gold cross. You re going to live with me now, Philip, said Mr. Carey. Shall you like that Two years before Philip had been sent down to stay at the vicarage after an attack of chicken pox but there remained with him a recollection of an attic and a large garden rather than of his uncle and aunt. Yes. You must look upon me and your Aunt Louisa as your father and mother. The child s mouth trembled a little, he reddened, bayern munich black long sleeve jersey but did not answer. Your dear mother left you in my charge. 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Bayern Munich Black Long Sleeve Jersey e mortal and must die. They too loved and must part from those they loved, the son from his mother, the wife from her husband and perhaps it was more tragic because their lives were ugly and sordid, and they knew nothing that gave beauty to the world. There was one stone which was very beautiful, a bas relief of two young men holding each other s hand and the reticence of line, the simplicity, made one like to think that the sculptor here had been touched with a genuine emotion. It was an exquisite memorial to that than which the world offers but one thing more precious, to a friendship and as Philip looked at it, he felt the tears come to his eyes. He thought of Hayward and his eager admiration for him when first they met, and how disillusion had come and then indifference, till nothing held them together but habit and old memories. It was one of the queer things of life that you saw a person every day for months and were so intimate with him that you could not imagine existence without him then separation came, and everything went on in the same way, and the companion who had seemed essential proved unnecessary. Your life proceeded and you did not even miss him. Philip thought of those early days in Heidelberg when Hayward, capable of great things, had been full of enthusiasm for the future, and how, little by little, achieving nothing, he had resigned himself to failure. Now he was dead. His death had been as futile as his life. He died ingloriously, of a stupid disease, failing once more, even at the end, to accomplish anything. It was just the same now as if he had never lived. Philip asked himself desperately what was the use of living at all. It all seemed inane. It was the same with Cronshaw it was quite unimportant that he had lived he was dead and forgotten, his book of poems sold in remainder by second hand booksellers his life seemed to have served nothing except to give a pushing journalist occasion to write an article in a review. And Philip cried out in his soul What is the use of it The effort was so incommensurate with the result. The bright hopes of youth had to be paid for at such a bitter price of disillusionment. Pain and disease and unhappiness weighed down the scale so heavily. What did it all mean He thought of his own life, the high hopes with which he had entered upon it, the limitations which his body forced upon him, his friendlessness, and the lack of affection which had surrounded his.read it was not a curse upon mankind, but the balm which reconciled it to existence. But Philip was impatient with himself he called to mind his idea of the pattern of life the unhappiness he had suffered was no more than part of a decoration which was elaborate and beautiful he told himself strenuously that he must accept with gaiety everything, dreariness and excitement, pleasure and pain, because it added to the richness of the design. He sought for beauty consciously, and he remembered how even as a boy he had taken pleasure in the Gothic cathedral as one saw it from the precincts he went there and looked at the massive pile, gray under the cloudy sky, with the central tower that rose like the praise of men to their God but the boys were batting at the nets, and they were bayern munich black long sleeve jersey lissom and strong and active he could not help hearing their shouts and laughter. The cry of youth was insistent, and he saw the beautiful thing before him only with his eyes. chapter 113 At the beginning of the last week in August Philip entered upon his duties in the district. They were arduous, for he had to attend on an average three confinements a day. The patient had obtained a card from the hospital some time before and when her time came it was taken to the porter by a messenger, bayern munich black long sleeve jersey generally a little girl, who was then sent across the road to the house in which Philip lodged. At night the porter, who had a latch key, himself came over and awoke Philip. It was mysterious then to get up in the darkness and walk through the deserted streets of the South Side. At those hours it was generally the husband who brought the card. If there had been a number of babies before he took it for the most part with surly indifference, but if newly married he was nervous and then sometimes strove to allay his anxiety by getting drunk. 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